The King’s Venison

Wednesday, May 13th, 2015 – Detroit City FC 0, Michigan Bucks 3

In medieval England it was quite a serious crime to hunt large game on the king’s land, which was virtually everywhere. Depending on the severity of whoever the monarch was at the time, punishment for such an offense could range anywhere from a fine and imprisonment to the removal of certain body parts or even death.

There was supposed to be good hunting in Pontiac on Wednesday – a wounded deer at half its strength would’ve made easy prey. Not only was this deer not wounded, however, it had antlers made of titanium and shot laser beams from its eyes.

Detroit City went into the match hopeful underdogs, with many (myself included) picking them to win outright. Their punishment for hunting the king’s venison wasn’t so severe as having an eye poked out or a hand cut off; it was merely suffering the most comprehensive and one-sided defeat in club history.

The Bucks controlled possession, executed quick-passing based attacks from the top of the 18 time and again, suffocated City’s midfielders, and only allowed one or two decent chances all night. It was a wake-up call for a club with big aspirations, both short-term and long-term.


This was Dan Duggan’s big day. He poured everything into it, from keeping the cameras off of the Northern Guard, to making sure the mics didn’t pick up too much of their noise (which was the loudest I’ve ever heard), to possibly even employing a ringer or too. He got his win, and in so doing certainly made an impression on the investors who were allegedly in attendance.

There are those who poke fun at Duggan for promising a pro team year after year and failing to deliver, and justifiably so. But you get the feeling that he recognizes this may be his last real chance so he’s going all in before City leapfrogs him in the pecking order (if they haven’t already).

The on-field battle was a rout, but the off-the-field debate will rage on into the summer and fall. In the meantime, City will be hunting a different type of game. Hopefully their arrows will fly straighter than they did this night.


4 thoughts on “The King’s Venison”

  1. I was frankly surprised by the Bucks dominance last night, especially after hearing that Stefan St. Louis might be playing for them.
    Those who underestimate Dan Duggan, do so at their peril. That said, the Bucks success has not brought higher division soccer to the Detroit area to date.
    However, I do have a theory about that. At many of the Bucks historically “big” games (US Open v MLS teams, for example) the Bucks will have Dominic Scicluna and his Waza Break Dancers perform at half-time (I am not making this up). I personally think those half-times have set back the coming of pro soccer to Detroit by 10 years.
    Dominic was in attendance last night, but mercifully, did not perform.
    On to the division and the Rust Belt Derby. I hope last night provides motivation for upcoming season.
    By the way, I don’t know if Dan tried to neutralize the NG to any degree. He/Ultimate did, however, allow the sale of long neck glass bottled beer which were brought into the arena. Who says the Bucks aren’t a cutting edge, hip organization? A nervy one, certainly.

  2. If I’m an investor, I’m not looking at the results on the field because those aren’t the players I’m going to have on a Duggan USL team anyway. I’m looking for proven success in the business side of the operation — sponsors and fans, most meaningfully — and that’s where DCFC was clearly light years ahead of Duggan last night.

  3. I agree with Aiede. Having a better team today means nothing in the context of viable growth for these clubs (the not Neal Ruhl announcer called them both “fantastic franchises,” which made me want to punch stuff and murder things). If investors were actually present, and the atmosphere was as charged as you say (and I believe that it was, I just couldn’t hear/see it from the live stream), I can’t imagine them walking away thinking that the future of Detroit soccer belongs to the Bucks.
    I think minimizing the Northern Guard’s broadcast presence helped further Duggan’s agenda more than the head-to-head win, but I’m not sure he accomplished much on that front either since blocking out the DCFC contingent made it feel like there was hardly anybody there at all.

  4. Goddamn i love these responses. Dcfc is on the up and up. Cannot wait until tomorrow night.

    Duggan is a price gouging fuck.

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